I had a mini-meltdown today. I have let things pile up for awhile and for the past three days it has all been falling down around me, and I am not handling it so well.
My term paper and another tedious reflective letter are due on Wednesday. I have not touched either of them. I am going to fail my algebra class. I have a small website to design as the final for my internet/intranet design class. I attempted to start on all of these things today, by totally crashing at 9:30PM and waking up four hours later.
J and I must have experienced a fracture or a break in our relationship. Some rather nasty things were said by both of us, and I remember crying a lot and asking why he was being so mean. Then he went home and argued with some other people, right before his big hunting trip. Then last night his whole bad energy situation reached boiling point and he ended up getting attacked by someone in my backyard and now has a black eye and a wounded sense of man-pride.. I can’t stop thinking about all those terrible things we said. I know we both meant them, and now it’s festering away while we are ignoring the whole spat in favor of making his trip a tiny bit more enjoyable.
My mouth has stopped hurting, but now it is my face that hurts, specifically my upper jaw, which is super sore.
When I came home from class today I sat and cried in the driveway for a little bit. I really shouldn’t let things get so out of control before I try to fix them.